Lockdown is here

[ninjarabbi]

B&Q is shut and you realise your plan to sand down and repaint all your skirting boards has fallen apart and then; at the back of a cupboard you find.....

 

[Allflapnofly]

Well with me being a self employed professional housebreaker/burglar.....My hard earned income has taken a considerable huge hit and it's all due to the majority of my targeted homes being selfishly occupied 24/7.....The sooner this goddam virus pandemic is over, the sooner I can get back to earning a decent and honest crust......In the meantime I'm offering my services as a professional dog walker to the housebound and virus vulnerable .....If their dogs aren't pedigree or worth a few bob I'll occasionally take 'em back to their owners.....Got top whack for a French bulldog the other day off a local dodgy dog breeder.....Needs is must.....

 

[vim_fuego]

Well with me being a self employed professional housebreaker/burglar.....My hard earned income has taken a considerable huge hit and it's all due to the majority of my targeted homes being selfishly occupied 24/7.....The sooner this goddam virus pandemic is over, the sooner I can get back to earning a decent and honest crust......In the meantime I'm offering my services as a professional dog walker to the housebound and virus vulnerable .....If their dogs aren't pedigree or worth a few bob I'll occasionally take 'em back to their owners.....Got top whack for a French bulldog the other day off a local dodgy dog breeder.....Needs is must.....

You Sir, are a bloody hero.

 

[ninjarabbi]

You Sir, are a bloody hero.

Totally agree. Now, any chance of a Rolex Explorer? Will accept an Omega Speedmaster.....

 

[Rocket_Ronster]

You Sir, are a scouser.

FTFY

 

[Defenestration]

Day one of working from home. If anything, it has been even busier than usual. Up at 0630 to collect my wife from work (care worker who refuses to learn to drive) off to work 40 mins away to collect laptop etc.

2 coffees at work, back home for 1200 set up home office and non-stop from there. 51 minutes to go.

 

[Oldstacker]

Well with me being a self employed professional housebreaker/burglar.....My hard earned income has taken a considerable huge hit and it's all due to the majority of my targeted homes being selfishly occupied 24/7.....The sooner this goddam virus pandemic is over, the sooner I can get back to earning a decent and honest crust......In the meantime I'm offering my services as a professional dog walker to the housebound and virus vulnerable .....If their dogs aren't pedigree or worth a few bob I'll occasionally take 'em back to their owners.....Got top whack for a French bulldog the other day off a local dodgy dog breeder.....Needs is must.....

You'd have been safer selling to a take-away; the evidence would disappear quicker

 

[Allflapnofly]

You'd have been safer selling to a take-away; the evidence would disappear quicker

Yeah I thought about it.....But unfortunately those take-away customers would then probably have electronic chips with everything......

 

[muttywhitedog]

My entire office shut on Tuesday at very short notice. Three days later and some of my team are already starting to feel the strain of sitting at home - strangely they are the ones that complain the most about being overworked when we are there.

 

[Downsizer]

My entire office shut on Tuesday at very short notice. Three days later and some of my team are already starting to feel the strain of sitting at home - strangely they are the ones that complain the most about being overworked when we are there.

As CS I presume you guys are still getting paid? Is it a %cut, full pay, just curious...

 

[muttywhitedog]

We are getting paid, and any sickness associated with Covid-19 will not count towards accrued sickness absence. That said, the amount of folk who were already off with underlying conditions, age, pregnancy, stress etc far overshadowed the number of people who were actually sick with symptoms. It has shocked me how "fragile" many of my colleagues are when the sh!t hits the fan. When I return, I'll definitely be looking at some folk in a different way - same way as I looked at the RAF twisted socks when I was going to Afghan for the 3rd and 4th time in 3 years.

 

[Allflapnofly]

 

[Oldstacker]

We are getting paid, and any sickness associated with Covid-19 will not count towards accrued sickness absence. That said, the amount of folk who were already off with underlying conditions, age, pregnancy, stress etc far overshadowed the number of people who were actually sick with symptoms. It has shocked me how "fragile" many of my colleagues are when the sh!t hits the fan. When I return, I'll definitely be looking at some folk in a different way - same way as I looked at the RAF twisted socks when I was going to Afghan for the 3rd and 4th time in 3 years.

In my area of the business we are already providing support to the Mil response to COVID-19 and i have been doing ~9 hour days wfh (keeps me out of Mrs Oldstacker's way ) and have had requests for staff to be temporarily detached for more specific anti-COVID tasks.

 

[Tin basher]

Had my first "at home" lock down haircut today as my local barbers is closed. Which prompted a thought in TB's old head have they relaxed the rules for the serving members?? Barbers being shut, maintain 6 foot social distancing and all that. Hipster beards coupled with long hair by June perhaps.

 

[Rocket_Ronster]

Good news everyone, our local Ford/Skoda dealership is still open.

For when you really need that essential/emergency Mondeo.

Dealership now closed.

Luckily Halfords has reopened, wankers.

We should have a thread on the most ridiculous "key" enterprises still open.

 

[Hot Shoes]

Copied this from the BBC, possibly car sales is stretching the word "Essential" but the servicing side would certainly fit within the guidelines. Copied it from an article about over zealous officials trying to ban the sale of Easter Eggs. Seems there is no definition of essential goods a food shop can sell

Essential retailers
After strict new restrictions were brought in by government earlier this week, it issued a list of “essential retailers”, that are allowed to stay open. They include:

• Supermarkets and other food shops
• Pharmacies
• Off-licences and licensed shops selling alcohol, including those within breweries
• Petrol stations
• Newsagents
• Bicycle shops
• Home and hardware stores
• Launderettes and dry cleaners
• Garages
• Pet shops
• Post offices
• Banks

 

[Rocket_Ronster]

They shut for 2 days, obviously thought they weren't eligible.

I dislike the "we've got a vending machine, so we're a food outlet" attitude.

 

[busby1971]

Easter eggs aren’t running, despite some jobsworth trying to ban their sale

Coronavirus: Easter egg crackdown over essential status 'wrong' https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/business-52090441

 

[Oldstacker]

Copied this from the BBC, possibly car sales is stretching the word "Essential" but the servicing side would certainly fit within the guidelines. Copied it from an article about over zealous officials trying to ban the sale of Easter Eggs. Seems there is no definition of essential goods a food shop can sell

Essential retailers
After strict new restrictions were brought in by government earlier this week, it issued a list of “essential retailers”, that are allowed to stay open. They include:

• Supermarkets and other food shops
• Pharmacies
• Off-licences and licensed shops selling alcohol, including those within breweries
• Petrol stations
• Newsagents
• Bicycle shops
• Home and hardware stores
• Launderettes and dry cleaners
• Garages
• Pet shops
• Post offices
• Banks

By my reading of that, Curry's PC World aren't essential - so it was a good job yesterday that Tesco had vga cables on the shelf so that I can stop using my laptop screen (ridiculously small) and connect it to our spare monitor (for some reason the HDMI cable wasn't working....). With all the wfh going on i suspect that more than a few people are going to be looking for all sorts of IT hardware and accessories and on-line shopping is not always the best way for some items. If we are going to be wfh for up to 12 weeks then turning more of our home into office space is going to become essential.

 

[justintime129]

If the shops are allowed to open then that should be the end of it.