Hello. This is where the RAF as a family can be so supportive. I am impressed about you keeping your humour too. I'm healthy and have no sense of humour. I'll readjust my thoughts now I think. I think you can write to your Life Insurance Company, if you have one and claim a lump sum up front. I've always noticed this in the small print. I might be wrong but it may be worth pursuing. I wish you all the very best mate, a very close friend of mine had the same condition.
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Saw the SAAFA rep yesterday and she was really helpfull and supportive so good call about getting them on board sooner rather than later guys. She is going to get the pensions people involved so we should know exactly what would be coming in the way of lumps sums etc.
I have now transfered to Holding flight at my request, felt guilty about not going into work every day, and the guys working man down so I felt it was the right decision for everyone concerned.
Heard back from the Department of Work & Pensions today and hit the jackpot.
top rate for Carers part of Disability Living Allowance
top rate for Mobility Allowance part of DLA
this totals £125.00 per week
automatic qualification for a Blue Badge for parking
free car tax.
plus my wife will qualify for carers allowance at £55 per week.
If I had the energy i'd be dancing, but for now I can't get the grin of my chops.
I will post any other stuff I come accross as we work through the illness and hopefully it could be used as a reference for others who sadly may follow me.
I have now transfered to Holding flight at my request, felt guilty about not going into work every day, and the guys working man down so I felt it was the right decision for everyone concerned.
Heard back from the Department of Work & Pensions today and hit the jackpot.
top rate for Carers part of Disability Living Allowance
top rate for Mobility Allowance part of DLA
this totals £125.00 per week
automatic qualification for a Blue Badge for parking
free car tax.
plus my wife will qualify for carers allowance at £55 per week.
If I had the energy i'd be dancing, but for now I can't get the grin of my chops.
I will post any other stuff I come accross as we work through the illness and hopefully it could be used as a reference for others who sadly may follow me.
fed_up_scribbly
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Spec,
So sorry to hear your news but glad you're keeping your sense of humour - you certainly put things into perspective for me.
There's been some good gen posted so far that'll be of great use to others who may find themselves in a similiar situation. Nice to see the DWP giving benefits to somebody who actually deserves them for a change.....
So sorry to hear your news but glad you're keeping your sense of humour - you certainly put things into perspective for me.
There's been some good gen posted so far that'll be of great use to others who may find themselves in a similiar situation. Nice to see the DWP giving benefits to somebody who actually deserves them for a change.....
Fairynuff31
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Spec,
To echo the thoughts of others, can I offer my heartfelt sympathies at this most dificult time?
Even though I'm not in the least bit a gayer - would it help if I offered you a hug? (As long as RAFBird is still in the process of hugging you, of course - a 3 way, now theres a though to add to a bucket list)
Chin up dude
DT_Xtremez_14:
To echo the thoughts of others, can I offer my heartfelt sympathies at this most dificult time?
Even though I'm not in the least bit a gayer - would it help if I offered you a hug? (As long as RAFBird is still in the process of hugging you, of course - a 3 way, now theres a though to add to a bucket list)
Chin up dude
DT_Xtremez_14:
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Cheers for the hugs guys, my bike will eventually be sold as I can't have a £1800 shed ornament sat there when I will be beyond cycling it even though it is awsome just to look at, I will probably ask the guys in work to sell it for me on camp.
I drive a 7 seat black Previa but plan on being around to drive it for a long time yet, my benifits get reviewed in May 2014, ha ha.
I had no idea my watch was so coveted either but that will be going in a box for my 2 year old son.
I drive a 7 seat black Previa but plan on being around to drive it for a long time yet, my benifits get reviewed in May 2014, ha ha.
I had no idea my watch was so coveted either but that will be going in a box for my 2 year old son.
T
The Masked Geek
Guest
I've done a little dance for you. Anyone with balls enough to put this all on here deserves everything he can get.
Dave-exfairy
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Agreed, good to see you've still got the RAF black humour.
If you're coming up for 20 years then you started a month before me (17th Jul '91).
Kia kaha dude
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Two ways of dealing with this.
If you don`t want/need the new car, you can get the road-tax free for your existing car. Cash in your tax disc at the postie and get the years freebie.
If you go for the new car. Be aware that Mrs Spech will not be insured for driving it the minute you fall off the perch. Its sad but true that the contract terminates immediately. Also, go through the list of available cars carefully, don`t make the mistake that i did and go for a cheap one trying to keep costs down. (When they say `full allowance`-they mean full mobility allowance, which isn`t your £125 a week, its the mobility section which will be around £35 a week.) Its not just new cars on the scheme either, approved quality second hand vehicles are also available. I`ve first hand knowledge of a lad in Bradford who got a VW camper on the Mobility Scheme, could be worth a look to get you out of the house.
Feck it! Ladies and Gents, lets all do a little dance for Spesh, pass it on!!
(now then, some Dad dancing or a little Rhumba?)
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Been to the Post Office already, re-taxed my car in the disabled class, got new tax disc there and then, old one is in an envelope to dvlc for a refund, it could't have been easier. My wife never drives the Previa it's too big so she is happy with her golf, so no insurance switching required.
full mobility allowance part of DLA is indeed £35ish per week
carers higher rate part of DLA is £73.odds per week
carers allowance is £53.odds per week.
full mobility allowance part of DLA is indeed £35ish per week
carers higher rate part of DLA is £73.odds per week
carers allowance is £53.odds per week.
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How is your wife and wider family dealing with this?
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My wife is the stoic type who appears to be gliding like a duck however i'm sure the legs are paddling like mad. We just have to watch out for signs of cracking up and be there with the cuddle when its needed She feels, as do i that it's hard to see me as ill when i'm sat on the setee next to her with no outwardly signs other than being very skinny, having a distended stomach and usually knackered by the evening. My mother in law was down when i was first diagnosed and stayed on a few days, this meant it was nearly a week before we could sort of look at it together and basically bawl our eyes out.
The kids are my trigger, i can't talk about them to doctors etc without choking up but every single one asks how old they are etc, it must be on my records loads but everyone always asks.
My kids are ok, if they ask questions, they get truthfull answers but we will tell them about the "terminal" bit when it needs addressing.
Wider family, i don't really have one apart from my brother, his wife and their 2 kids up in Edinburgh. My parents both died of cancer so it's not our first touch with with it or the processes involved in it.
The kids are my trigger, i can't talk about them to doctors etc without choking up but every single one asks how old they are etc, it must be on my records loads but everyone always asks.
My kids are ok, if they ask questions, they get truthfull answers but we will tell them about the "terminal" bit when it needs addressing.
Wider family, i don't really have one apart from my brother, his wife and their 2 kids up in Edinburgh. My parents both died of cancer so it's not our first touch with with it or the processes involved in it.
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Thanks for sharing that with us...You and your wife are big enough to thrash it out between you and emotionally mature enough to find common ground and rationale with the situation however painful it is and will get but the kids I shudder to think of the toll that will take on the both of you when it comes time to fess up...
You have my respect for your approach to this horrible situation and support [of the whole site I'm confident in saying] for the coming months...post here for company, for support or for sh1ts and giggles and someone will always listen.
FOGHORN LEGHORN
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I'll second that.
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My diagnosis was a bit of a round the houses mess. I had stomach problems about 4 years ago which a civvy doc in the med cen thought was diverticulitus and treated with anti-biotics, i changed my diet and all was ok.
I started losing weight at the start of this year and by Feb had lost a stone. i also developed stomach cramps in the same area as the previous problem, same doc same anti- boitics but he never even got me to take my shirt off or check me over, same a few days before when i had a los30 signing on medical with him although he said i had blood in my urine sample and had to go and do another one a few days later, this also had blood and protein but he passed me ok and sent the sample off which apparently came back fine.
Back to med cen but saw a new locum who was in his fifties and generally more experienced then the usual orthapedic sprains the med cen get presented with. He had me on the bench within minutes and had noticed my liver was enlarged, he called in the Smo and both aggreed i was to be addmitted to Basingstoke Hopspital the next day, (he actually though i would be operated on within 48 hrs). In Hospital i had blood tests, a CT scan (which discovered the tumours) and eventually a liver biopsy was taken. I got out after 3 days.
They had trouble typing the cells from the biopsy so sent it to Kings college London then The John Radcliff in Oxford but again no joy.
In all this time (6weeks) i had no contact from the hospital and was at my wits end, the locum was brilliant phoning consultants, he even arranged a colonoscopy and flexible sigmiodscope as the hospital were slow and in the end he wrote to the Hos Trust Ceo appalled at my treatment or lack off.
He also got me addmitted back into hospital on a bogus bowel blockage so they couldn't ignore me any longer. Another Ct scan revealed the tumors in my Liver, around my decending colon & on my peritoneum (bag that holds your organs together were growing rapidly, i had lost another stone in weight by now. More blood tests, urine tests and i got out of hospital after 3 days.
An oncologist told me in the hospital bed that i had cancer of unknown primary, should have chemo but that it wouldn't be a cure. It came as a bit of a shock and unless you ask them for straight talking they refer to "lumps" instead of tumours etc. It was now 8 weeks since i had first been admitted.
My wife and i saw my consultant oncologist a week later who is a straight talker
3 months without chemo or 9-12 with. I obviously knew that that it was terminal but that hit quite hard.
My immediate though was my boy is only 2 and i want to take him to school on his first day, who will be his male role model etc, my 13 year old is a very bright, clever, head screwed on the right way girl so i have no great worries about her growing up well adjusted but my 7 year old girl is the arty sensitive type who i am sure will put my wife through the mangler as she grows.
Luckily i am allergic to Brufen or i would probably have been given pallet loads of the stuff by the civvy doc.
Again i cannot stress how much help the locum who spotted this was and still is, he phoned me everyday in hospital, went round to see my wife on his last day of his contract and i have his personal contact number, the Smo has also been great.
I started losing weight at the start of this year and by Feb had lost a stone. i also developed stomach cramps in the same area as the previous problem, same doc same anti- boitics but he never even got me to take my shirt off or check me over, same a few days before when i had a los30 signing on medical with him although he said i had blood in my urine sample and had to go and do another one a few days later, this also had blood and protein but he passed me ok and sent the sample off which apparently came back fine.
Back to med cen but saw a new locum who was in his fifties and generally more experienced then the usual orthapedic sprains the med cen get presented with. He had me on the bench within minutes and had noticed my liver was enlarged, he called in the Smo and both aggreed i was to be addmitted to Basingstoke Hopspital the next day, (he actually though i would be operated on within 48 hrs). In Hospital i had blood tests, a CT scan (which discovered the tumours) and eventually a liver biopsy was taken. I got out after 3 days.
They had trouble typing the cells from the biopsy so sent it to Kings college London then The John Radcliff in Oxford but again no joy.
In all this time (6weeks) i had no contact from the hospital and was at my wits end, the locum was brilliant phoning consultants, he even arranged a colonoscopy and flexible sigmiodscope as the hospital were slow and in the end he wrote to the Hos Trust Ceo appalled at my treatment or lack off.
He also got me addmitted back into hospital on a bogus bowel blockage so they couldn't ignore me any longer. Another Ct scan revealed the tumors in my Liver, around my decending colon & on my peritoneum (bag that holds your organs together were growing rapidly, i had lost another stone in weight by now. More blood tests, urine tests and i got out of hospital after 3 days.
An oncologist told me in the hospital bed that i had cancer of unknown primary, should have chemo but that it wouldn't be a cure. It came as a bit of a shock and unless you ask them for straight talking they refer to "lumps" instead of tumours etc. It was now 8 weeks since i had first been admitted.
My wife and i saw my consultant oncologist a week later who is a straight talker
3 months without chemo or 9-12 with. I obviously knew that that it was terminal but that hit quite hard.
My immediate though was my boy is only 2 and i want to take him to school on his first day, who will be his male role model etc, my 13 year old is a very bright, clever, head screwed on the right way girl so i have no great worries about her growing up well adjusted but my 7 year old girl is the arty sensitive type who i am sure will put my wife through the mangler as she grows.
Luckily i am allergic to Brufen or i would probably have been given pallet loads of the stuff by the civvy doc.
Again i cannot stress how much help the locum who spotted this was and still is, he phoned me everyday in hospital, went round to see my wife on his last day of his contract and i have his personal contact number, the Smo has also been great.
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