07 45hrs Thursday RAF Anyway, Regiment Flt
A varied group of Techies, Clerks (HR Specialists), Cooks and Blanket Stackers are all lounging around waiting for the annual CCS class to start.
Instructor 'Right yous lot listen in, I am Cpl Penguins Suck your CCS instructor. . From now on, yous will speak only when spoken to, and the first and last word out of your mouth will be, Cpl! Do yous maggots understand?
The airmen mumble "Cpl Yes, Cpl."
PS ‘Right yous lot listen in. I can't hear you! Sound off like yous got a pair!"
"Cpl YES, CPL!"
PS Right yous lot listen in. Yous maggots had better start looking like RAF tradesmen. Do not think for one second that yous are Rocks. Right, its bop night tonight, so yous lot better not fcuk around because I want an early stack today'
Bitburger (in a John Wayne voice): "I think I'm going to hate this course’
[I] Sausage2 laughs, Cpl Penguins sucks laughs, too and walks slowly back along the line of airmen. "Right yous lot listen in. Who said that?"
Silence
Cpl Penguins Suck peers into each face. "Right yous lot listen in. Who said that?"
Bitburger "Cpl I did, Cpl'
Cpl Penguins Sucks aims his index finger between,Bitburger 's eyes and says, ",""Right yous listen in, I like honesty. I like yous. Hell, yous can come over to my house and fcuk my sister."
He grins.He punches Bitburger in the stomach. Bitburger sinks to his knees.
PS "Right yous, listen in before I do yous over. Yous little scumbag. I got your name. I got your ass. Yous will not laugh. Yous will not cry. Yous will learn by the numbers. I will teach yous to forward assist., if I ever see yous in the bop I will do yous over, stomp on your spleen and snap your spine
.
Cpl Penguins Suck puts his fists on his hips. "Right yous lot listen in. If yous ladies ever leave my classroom, if yous survive CCS training, yous will be a weapon, yous will be a minister of death, praying for war, yous will forward assist. Until that day you are pukes, you are scumbags, you are the lowest term of life on Earth. Yous are not even human. Yous people are nothing but a lot of little pieces of amphibian sh1t. and I am on the same pay scale as yous , so no more techie fat wallet jokes
Sausage2 grins
PS ""Right yous listen in. Yous got a name, scumbag?"
"Cpl, I'm sausage2, Cpl," he says with a thick Welsh accent.
PS ""Right yous lot listen in, sausage2 thinks I am a real funny guy. He thinks that CCS is more fun then a sucking chest wound."
Sausage2's face is frozen into a permanent expression of oat-fed innocence. Penguins suck punches sausage2 in the chest.
PS " Right yous lot listen in, Yous maggots are not going to have any fun here. Yous are not going to enjoy standing in straight lines and yous are not going to enjoy massaging your own wand. My orders are to weed out all nonhackers and non forward assistors who do not pack the gear to serve in my beloved Corps. Because I am hard, yous will not like me. But the more yous hate me, the more yous will learn to forward assist. I am hard but I am fair. There is no racial bigotry here. because here yous are all equally worthless. Do yous understand?"
Some of the airmen mumble, "Cpl, Yes. Yeah. Yes, Cpl."
PS " Right yous lot listen in, I can't hear you, ladies!
"Cpl, YES, Cpl! "
PS " Right yous lot listen in, yous fcuk me off. Hit the deck." They crumple down onto the floor.
PS "Yous got no motivation, yous dont know how to forward assist. Do yous hear me, maggots? Listen up. I will give yous motivation. yous don't even know how to forward assist, I will show yous how to forward assist. Yous have no esprit de corp. I will give yous esprit de corps. Yous have no traditions. I will give yous traditions.
Cpl Penguins Suck struts, ramrod straight, hands on hips.
PS " Right yous lot listen in GET UP! GET UP!"
They get up, knees Sore, hands gritty.
PS " Right yous lot listen in Yous fat techie scumbags are too slow. Hit the deck."
Down.
Up.
Down.
Up.
Down.
PS. " Right yous lot listen in, Jesus H. Christ. Yous maggots are huffing and puffing the way your momma did the first time your old man put the meat to her."GET UP! GET UP!"
.
Sausage2 is slow getting up.Cpl Penguins Suck stands over him over him.
" Right yous listen in , on your feet yous fat techie tos$er
Sausage2gets up on one knee, hesitates, and then stands up, inhaling and exhaling. He grins.
PS " Right yous listen in. Why are you grinning at me, sausage2?"
S2 "I can't help it, Cpl!"
PS " Right yous listen in Yous got a crush on me?"
S2 "No, Cpl!"
PS Yous want to smoke my pole?"
S2 "No, Cpl!"
PS "Don't yous lie to me."
S2 "Cpl, I'm not...lying to you."
PS "YOU? YOU? Did yous say YOU? Everyone knows its yous not you. Do yous know what a ewe is? A ewe is a female sheep. A female sheep is for fcuking! Yous should know that yous is Welsh. Why do yous want to fcuk your CCS instructor???"
Cpl Penguins sucks punches sausage2 in the chest hard. Sausage2 doubles over with pain.
PS "Why did yous come on CCS?"
Sausage2 "Cpl To become a man, Cpl!"
PS "sausage2, yous may just be the very dumbest Techie in RAF History.
To be continued>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
A varied group of Techies, Clerks (HR Specialists), Cooks and Blanket Stackers are all lounging around waiting for the annual CCS class to start.
Instructor 'Right yous lot listen in, I am Cpl Penguins Suck your CCS instructor. . From now on, yous will speak only when spoken to, and the first and last word out of your mouth will be, Cpl! Do yous maggots understand?
The airmen mumble "Cpl Yes, Cpl."
PS ‘Right yous lot listen in. I can't hear you! Sound off like yous got a pair!"
"Cpl YES, CPL!"
PS Right yous lot listen in. Yous maggots had better start looking like RAF tradesmen. Do not think for one second that yous are Rocks. Right, its bop night tonight, so yous lot better not fcuk around because I want an early stack today'
Bitburger (in a John Wayne voice): "I think I'm going to hate this course’
[I] Sausage2 laughs, Cpl Penguins sucks laughs, too and walks slowly back along the line of airmen. "Right yous lot listen in. Who said that?"
Silence
Cpl Penguins Suck peers into each face. "Right yous lot listen in. Who said that?"
Bitburger "Cpl I did, Cpl'
Cpl Penguins Sucks aims his index finger between,Bitburger 's eyes and says, ",""Right yous listen in, I like honesty. I like yous. Hell, yous can come over to my house and fcuk my sister."
He grins.He punches Bitburger in the stomach. Bitburger sinks to his knees.
PS "Right yous, listen in before I do yous over. Yous little scumbag. I got your name. I got your ass. Yous will not laugh. Yous will not cry. Yous will learn by the numbers. I will teach yous to forward assist., if I ever see yous in the bop I will do yous over, stomp on your spleen and snap your spine
.
Cpl Penguins Suck puts his fists on his hips. "Right yous lot listen in. If yous ladies ever leave my classroom, if yous survive CCS training, yous will be a weapon, yous will be a minister of death, praying for war, yous will forward assist. Until that day you are pukes, you are scumbags, you are the lowest term of life on Earth. Yous are not even human. Yous people are nothing but a lot of little pieces of amphibian sh1t. and I am on the same pay scale as yous , so no more techie fat wallet jokes
Sausage2 grins
PS ""Right yous listen in. Yous got a name, scumbag?"
"Cpl, I'm sausage2, Cpl," he says with a thick Welsh accent.
PS ""Right yous lot listen in, sausage2 thinks I am a real funny guy. He thinks that CCS is more fun then a sucking chest wound."
Sausage2's face is frozen into a permanent expression of oat-fed innocence. Penguins suck punches sausage2 in the chest.
PS " Right yous lot listen in, Yous maggots are not going to have any fun here. Yous are not going to enjoy standing in straight lines and yous are not going to enjoy massaging your own wand. My orders are to weed out all nonhackers and non forward assistors who do not pack the gear to serve in my beloved Corps. Because I am hard, yous will not like me. But the more yous hate me, the more yous will learn to forward assist. I am hard but I am fair. There is no racial bigotry here. because here yous are all equally worthless. Do yous understand?"
Some of the airmen mumble, "Cpl, Yes. Yeah. Yes, Cpl."
PS " Right yous lot listen in, I can't hear you, ladies!
"Cpl, YES, Cpl! "
PS " Right yous lot listen in, yous fcuk me off. Hit the deck." They crumple down onto the floor.
PS "Yous got no motivation, yous dont know how to forward assist. Do yous hear me, maggots? Listen up. I will give yous motivation. yous don't even know how to forward assist, I will show yous how to forward assist. Yous have no esprit de corp. I will give yous esprit de corps. Yous have no traditions. I will give yous traditions.
Cpl Penguins Suck struts, ramrod straight, hands on hips.
PS " Right yous lot listen in GET UP! GET UP!"
They get up, knees Sore, hands gritty.
PS " Right yous lot listen in Yous fat techie scumbags are too slow. Hit the deck."
Down.
Up.
Down.
Up.
Down.
PS. " Right yous lot listen in, Jesus H. Christ. Yous maggots are huffing and puffing the way your momma did the first time your old man put the meat to her."GET UP! GET UP!"
.
Sausage2 is slow getting up.Cpl Penguins Suck stands over him over him.
" Right yous listen in , on your feet yous fat techie tos$er
Sausage2gets up on one knee, hesitates, and then stands up, inhaling and exhaling. He grins.
PS " Right yous listen in. Why are you grinning at me, sausage2?"
S2 "I can't help it, Cpl!"
PS " Right yous listen in Yous got a crush on me?"
S2 "No, Cpl!"
PS Yous want to smoke my pole?"
S2 "No, Cpl!"
PS "Don't yous lie to me."
S2 "Cpl, I'm not...lying to you."
PS "YOU? YOU? Did yous say YOU? Everyone knows its yous not you. Do yous know what a ewe is? A ewe is a female sheep. A female sheep is for fcuking! Yous should know that yous is Welsh. Why do yous want to fcuk your CCS instructor???"
Cpl Penguins sucks punches sausage2 in the chest hard. Sausage2 doubles over with pain.
PS "Why did yous come on CCS?"
Sausage2 "Cpl To become a man, Cpl!"
PS "sausage2, yous may just be the very dumbest Techie in RAF History.
To be continued>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
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