B
BillytheFish
Guest
This has been doing the rounds at work
Apologies to the author:
You are the Boss
1. You have been appointed to your first command post. Congratulations! What is important to you?
a. Achieving the correct balance of change along with looking after your personnel.
b. Fostering a spirit of loyalty to the service and professionalism.
c. Having your own car parking space and a little flag.
2. Your new unit has a joint role. Do you?
a. Engender a team spirit that doesn’t compromise the needs of the individual.
b. Ensure that whilst your unit adheres to the joint concept, you retain RAF identity
c. Make sure that you have as many badges on your Soldier 95 as possible
3. A subordinate asks to speak to you; he has been nominated for another OOA just 12 months after returning from one. Do you?
a. Commiserate with him, promise to ring PMA and discuss the situation?
b. Tell him firmly but tactfully that it is inevitable but make sure that leave is arranged?
c. Shout and scream at him that operations come first?
4. PMA phones to let you know that been nominated for another OOA just 12 months after returning from one. Do you?
a. Accept it with resignation but acknowledge that the job has to be done?
b. Approach your boss and ask him to intercede whilst accepting that he/she may not be able to change things?
c. Shout and scream at PMA, your boss, and anyone in shouting range that it isn’t fair, that you are too important to deploy and that someone else ought to go?
5. Having got out of the OOA you suddenly become aware that this routine OOA option has become a full blown conflict. Do you?
a. Ignore the situation; after all you have firmly established your credentials for staying behind.
b. Discreetly let it be known, that should operational manning be critical, you might be able to deploy.
c. Ring PMA hourly, demanding to go on the operation, to a location not too close to the action but close enough to earn a gong.
6. You are the boss. One of your staff has pre-arranged an expensive family holiday which conflicts by a couple of days with your carefully arranged and coloured-in manning plot for OOA. Do you?
a. Acknowledge the importance of families and quality of life.
b. Consider altering the manning plot but warn the individual that he/she needs to have adequate insurance in future because the job is important.
c. Shout, scream and bluster about operations coming first and refuse to move the manning plot by one day to accommodate the individual because you have used permanent ink on your manning whiteboard.
7. What do the words: granularity, fidelity, robust, and overarching mean?
a. You have no idea and consult the Oxford English Dictionary
b. Sigh, recognise business buzz words and accept that some inadequate people need to use them.
c. These are excellent alternatives to ordinary words and prove how clever you are – you have to prove that all that time in Staff College hasn’t been wasted.
8. On returning from OOA, you notice that those who have been swanning around a rear area location like you have just been for 6 months, haven’t been given entitlement to the latest campaign medal. Do you?
a. Laugh it off, you weren’t in any real danger and at least you pocketed some LSSA.
b. Feel disappointed that your contribution hasn’t been recognised.
c. Moan, whinge and complain. Write furious letters to all and sundry. After all, if that bloke who won the VC got a campaign medal, why shouldn’t you?
9. You feel the need that your command needs to be operationally focussed. Do you?
a. Don’t feel too concerned, it’s your job to motivate people and anyway, service personnel are over-stretched as it is.
b. Develop an in-house training programme that incorporates operational awareness. Arrange visits, briefs and motivational training.
c. Insist that everyone wears Soldier 95 to work.
10. The inevitable occurs and you are posted to a job and decide the family will not be able to come with you – its time to become a bean stealer and move into the Mess for the first time in years. Do you?
a. Ensure that you use the Mess facilities occasionally just to be social.
b. Become an active Mess member, after all, it’s important to contribute to an important element of service life.
c. Live a Gollum-like existence in your room every night with your finger in your Ring, moan about the noise from the bar, ignoring the fact you once were also a single officer, only go to the bar if your one star attends, refuse to attend any function but demand 20 Summer Ball tickets every year.
11. A subordinate expresses concern that his flight is over-stretched. Another task has come in and the subordinate doesn’t think it can be achieved. Do you?
a. Thank them for having the courage to approach you and take it up with the chain of command.
b. Thank them for having the courage to approach you and undertake research into the workload to rebalance the workload.
c. Shout and scream at him that we are a can-do organisation and that operations come first.
12. What do the phrases “operations come first”, “this isn’t rocket science”, “we are a can-do organisation”, “we must embrace change”, mean to you?
a. Oh blimey, more buzz words.
b. Perfectly acceptable phrases if used in moderation and in the correct situations, taking care not to abuse them and not to engender a “yes-man Uriah Heep” environment
c. Excellent phrases and useful for bullying subordinates and ensuring that your career remains on track at the expense of everyone around you.
13. A subordinate presents you with some written work for your approval. Do you;
a. Check it carefully, there are some minor errors but the message is there as you required.
b. Make a few minor adjustments in line with SW conventions but thank the individual for their effort.
c. Get out the biggest pen you can find with red ink which writes like a melted mars bar and spend 3 hours making trivial corrections and alterations ensuring the individual feels worthless.
14. What do the names Albert Ball, Mick Mannock, Leonard Cheshire, and Guy Gibson mean to you?
a. Not too sure, they ring a bell and clearly served the RAF in some capacity
b. They are all VC winners and their feats deserve to be honoured
c. Time wasting scoundrels who haven’t been to Staff College, who don’t know that operations come first and who wouldn’t understand a Business Management Plan if it was shoved up their arses.
15. It is the unit beer call but the Station Commander reminds you that the AOC will be in bar at 1700. Do you?
a. Tactfully point out that you are already committed and you don’t want to let your team down.
b. Balance out the two, it isn’t difficult to get to both.
c. Sod the beer call, get to the bar before anyone else, order a single pint of lager shandy, sip from it all night, and hang around the Great Man as long as you can, laughing at his jokes and nodding sagely at his words of wisdom.
16. What is crucial to the future of the RAF?
a. Ensuring we fulfil our defence mission but without compromising the importance of our service personnel.
b. Delivering airpower acknowledging that sometimes we have to make sacrifices in our personal lives.
c. Cost cutting wherever possible, bullying and threatening subordinates to embrace (cuts) change, introducing PAYD and JPA at the expense of decent equipment whilst feathering ones own nest, preferably by arranging a nice, comfortable job outside the service.
17. If you compare yourself to a character in Lord of the Rings, who would it be?
a. A Hobbit – quiet, dependable with a mix of mischievousness and hidden bravery.
b. Aragorn – Courageous, loyal, with leadership qualities.
c. Gollum – yes, my precious, I loves my careers I do, my love. I hates everyone elses. Yes I hates them, my precious.
Answers:
Mostly As: You balance the needs of the Service with a strong streak of humanity. You clearly don’t understand that operations come first. This isn’t rocket science you know, you must appreciate that we are a can-do organisation.
Mostly Bs: You have clear sense of duty and identify with the ethos and traditions of the Royal Air Force. Bah! You clearly don’t understand that operations come first. This isn’t rocket science you know, you must appreciate that we are a can-do organisation.
Mostly Cs: Congratulations, you have all the overarching attributes that underpin the requirements of a successful staff officer in the 21st Century. You have a strong customer orientation focus fused with a clear corporate vision of how we can go forward combined with the essential element of cowardly self interest. Well done, you are obviously an SO2 or SO1 at the very least.
Apologies to the author:
You are the Boss
1. You have been appointed to your first command post. Congratulations! What is important to you?
a. Achieving the correct balance of change along with looking after your personnel.
b. Fostering a spirit of loyalty to the service and professionalism.
c. Having your own car parking space and a little flag.
2. Your new unit has a joint role. Do you?
a. Engender a team spirit that doesn’t compromise the needs of the individual.
b. Ensure that whilst your unit adheres to the joint concept, you retain RAF identity
c. Make sure that you have as many badges on your Soldier 95 as possible
3. A subordinate asks to speak to you; he has been nominated for another OOA just 12 months after returning from one. Do you?
a. Commiserate with him, promise to ring PMA and discuss the situation?
b. Tell him firmly but tactfully that it is inevitable but make sure that leave is arranged?
c. Shout and scream at him that operations come first?
4. PMA phones to let you know that been nominated for another OOA just 12 months after returning from one. Do you?
a. Accept it with resignation but acknowledge that the job has to be done?
b. Approach your boss and ask him to intercede whilst accepting that he/she may not be able to change things?
c. Shout and scream at PMA, your boss, and anyone in shouting range that it isn’t fair, that you are too important to deploy and that someone else ought to go?
5. Having got out of the OOA you suddenly become aware that this routine OOA option has become a full blown conflict. Do you?
a. Ignore the situation; after all you have firmly established your credentials for staying behind.
b. Discreetly let it be known, that should operational manning be critical, you might be able to deploy.
c. Ring PMA hourly, demanding to go on the operation, to a location not too close to the action but close enough to earn a gong.
6. You are the boss. One of your staff has pre-arranged an expensive family holiday which conflicts by a couple of days with your carefully arranged and coloured-in manning plot for OOA. Do you?
a. Acknowledge the importance of families and quality of life.
b. Consider altering the manning plot but warn the individual that he/she needs to have adequate insurance in future because the job is important.
c. Shout, scream and bluster about operations coming first and refuse to move the manning plot by one day to accommodate the individual because you have used permanent ink on your manning whiteboard.
7. What do the words: granularity, fidelity, robust, and overarching mean?
a. You have no idea and consult the Oxford English Dictionary
b. Sigh, recognise business buzz words and accept that some inadequate people need to use them.
c. These are excellent alternatives to ordinary words and prove how clever you are – you have to prove that all that time in Staff College hasn’t been wasted.
8. On returning from OOA, you notice that those who have been swanning around a rear area location like you have just been for 6 months, haven’t been given entitlement to the latest campaign medal. Do you?
a. Laugh it off, you weren’t in any real danger and at least you pocketed some LSSA.
b. Feel disappointed that your contribution hasn’t been recognised.
c. Moan, whinge and complain. Write furious letters to all and sundry. After all, if that bloke who won the VC got a campaign medal, why shouldn’t you?
9. You feel the need that your command needs to be operationally focussed. Do you?
a. Don’t feel too concerned, it’s your job to motivate people and anyway, service personnel are over-stretched as it is.
b. Develop an in-house training programme that incorporates operational awareness. Arrange visits, briefs and motivational training.
c. Insist that everyone wears Soldier 95 to work.
10. The inevitable occurs and you are posted to a job and decide the family will not be able to come with you – its time to become a bean stealer and move into the Mess for the first time in years. Do you?
a. Ensure that you use the Mess facilities occasionally just to be social.
b. Become an active Mess member, after all, it’s important to contribute to an important element of service life.
c. Live a Gollum-like existence in your room every night with your finger in your Ring, moan about the noise from the bar, ignoring the fact you once were also a single officer, only go to the bar if your one star attends, refuse to attend any function but demand 20 Summer Ball tickets every year.
11. A subordinate expresses concern that his flight is over-stretched. Another task has come in and the subordinate doesn’t think it can be achieved. Do you?
a. Thank them for having the courage to approach you and take it up with the chain of command.
b. Thank them for having the courage to approach you and undertake research into the workload to rebalance the workload.
c. Shout and scream at him that we are a can-do organisation and that operations come first.
12. What do the phrases “operations come first”, “this isn’t rocket science”, “we are a can-do organisation”, “we must embrace change”, mean to you?
a. Oh blimey, more buzz words.
b. Perfectly acceptable phrases if used in moderation and in the correct situations, taking care not to abuse them and not to engender a “yes-man Uriah Heep” environment
c. Excellent phrases and useful for bullying subordinates and ensuring that your career remains on track at the expense of everyone around you.
13. A subordinate presents you with some written work for your approval. Do you;
a. Check it carefully, there are some minor errors but the message is there as you required.
b. Make a few minor adjustments in line with SW conventions but thank the individual for their effort.
c. Get out the biggest pen you can find with red ink which writes like a melted mars bar and spend 3 hours making trivial corrections and alterations ensuring the individual feels worthless.
14. What do the names Albert Ball, Mick Mannock, Leonard Cheshire, and Guy Gibson mean to you?
a. Not too sure, they ring a bell and clearly served the RAF in some capacity
b. They are all VC winners and their feats deserve to be honoured
c. Time wasting scoundrels who haven’t been to Staff College, who don’t know that operations come first and who wouldn’t understand a Business Management Plan if it was shoved up their arses.
15. It is the unit beer call but the Station Commander reminds you that the AOC will be in bar at 1700. Do you?
a. Tactfully point out that you are already committed and you don’t want to let your team down.
b. Balance out the two, it isn’t difficult to get to both.
c. Sod the beer call, get to the bar before anyone else, order a single pint of lager shandy, sip from it all night, and hang around the Great Man as long as you can, laughing at his jokes and nodding sagely at his words of wisdom.
16. What is crucial to the future of the RAF?
a. Ensuring we fulfil our defence mission but without compromising the importance of our service personnel.
b. Delivering airpower acknowledging that sometimes we have to make sacrifices in our personal lives.
c. Cost cutting wherever possible, bullying and threatening subordinates to embrace (cuts) change, introducing PAYD and JPA at the expense of decent equipment whilst feathering ones own nest, preferably by arranging a nice, comfortable job outside the service.
17. If you compare yourself to a character in Lord of the Rings, who would it be?
a. A Hobbit – quiet, dependable with a mix of mischievousness and hidden bravery.
b. Aragorn – Courageous, loyal, with leadership qualities.
c. Gollum – yes, my precious, I loves my careers I do, my love. I hates everyone elses. Yes I hates them, my precious.
Answers:
Mostly As: You balance the needs of the Service with a strong streak of humanity. You clearly don’t understand that operations come first. This isn’t rocket science you know, you must appreciate that we are a can-do organisation.
Mostly Bs: You have clear sense of duty and identify with the ethos and traditions of the Royal Air Force. Bah! You clearly don’t understand that operations come first. This isn’t rocket science you know, you must appreciate that we are a can-do organisation.
Mostly Cs: Congratulations, you have all the overarching attributes that underpin the requirements of a successful staff officer in the 21st Century. You have a strong customer orientation focus fused with a clear corporate vision of how we can go forward combined with the essential element of cowardly self interest. Well done, you are obviously an SO2 or SO1 at the very least.
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